Someone You Love Is in Jail in Ontario: A Family Guide to the First Weeks

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If someone you love is in jail in Ontario, the first weeks are confusing. There is no orientation to incarceration, for them or for you. This free guide is for families. It covers what to keep off jail calls, how calls and money work, the unwritten rules inside, and how to set limits on calls.

Phase 1: Keep the case off the phone

Ontario's policy says jail calls aren't routinely monitored or recorded. Police can monitor or record specific calls with a warrant, though, and other people may be listening nearby. Treat every jail call as if someone else can hear it.

• No case talk: Never talk about the case on a jail call. Not what happened, not the evidence, not anyone else involved. That conversation belongs with their lawyer.
• If they bring it up: Say, "Let's save that for your lawyer," and change the subject. If they keep going, it's okay to end the call.
• Who it's private with: Conversations with their lawyer are protected by solicitor-client privilege. Calls with family and friends aren't, and neither are conversations with us.

Phase 2: Calls and money when a loved one is in jail

Their lawyer's office is there for the legal case. Questions about visits, property, clothing and canteen usually get answered faster by the jail itself. Here's how to handle the basics.

• Phone calls: Only the person inside can make calls. Ask the jail whether you can open a prepaid account to receive their calls. Ontario's provider is Synergy Inmate Phone Solutions.
• Money: Decide on a monthly amount you can afford for their trust account, and stick to it. The institution also caps weekly canteen spending. You're allowed to say no.
• No money to others: Never send money to anyone else. If they ask you to e-transfer money to another person, another inmate's family or an unknown email, say no. Requests like this can be a sign of pressure or debt inside. Don't pay debts run up on the range.

Phase 3: The unwritten rules of the range

Share it on an early call, in your own words. Don't print this page to mail in or bring it on a visit.

• Free isn't free: Encourage them to say "no thanks" to offers of coffee, food, tobacco or hygiene items from others, especially in the first days.
• How debt works inside: Taking something usually creates a debt, often at high interest. Unpaid debts can lead to threats or violence, and trouble inside can lead to institutional misconducts. How that could affect the case is a question for their lawyer.
• Polite and neutral: Be friendly, keep to yourself, and focus on the daily routine and the next court date.

Phase 4: Setting limits on calls

Calls from inside can be intense, for both of you. A simple schedule helps.

• Set a schedule: Agree on a rough plan, for example one call in the morning and one in the evening. Lockdowns happen, so a missed call isn't always a bad sign.
• Use calls for updates: Health, basic needs, messages from the lawyer's office and the next court date. Keep the case itself off the phone.
• Look after yourself: If a call turns into the same worries on a loop, or turns abusive, you can say you need to go and end it. If you're struggling, call or text 988, day or night.

You don't have to do this alone

We call it Bespoke Non-Legal Containment: we help your family with calls, money, visits, and what to tell employers and relatives, so you're not guessing. We don't give legal advice. Your lawyer handles the law.

Questions families ask

Are jail calls in Ontario recorded?

Ontario's policy says jail calls aren't routinely monitored or recorded. Police can monitor or record specific calls with a warrant, and other people may be listening nearby. Treat every call as if someone else can hear it, and keep the case off the phone.

How do I get calls from someone in an Ontario jail?

Only the person inside can make calls. Ask the jail whether you can open a prepaid account to receive their calls. Ontario's provider is Synergy Inmate Phone Solutions.

How much money should I put on their account?

Decide on a monthly amount you can afford for their trust account, and stick to it. The institution also caps weekly canteen spending. You're allowed to say no.

What if they ask me to send money to someone else?

Say no. Requests to e-transfer money to another person, another inmate's family or an unknown email can be a sign of pressure or debt inside. Don't pay debts run up on the range.

Who do I ask about visits, property or clothing?

The jail itself usually answers questions about visits, property, clothing and canteen faster. Questions about the case, the evidence or bail go to their lawyer or to duty counsel.

Need help with this?

This guide is general information, not legal advice. For legal questions, talk to your lawyer.